I once heard a comedian talking about obsessing over underwear and joking that it is in fact coordination that really gets a guy going. This has stuck with me ever since my breasts decided to sprout and my brain makes a point to reminisce over said joke every single time I am shopping for underwear; does coordination really matter?
On a poll on thestudentroom.co.uk 57 people voted ‘Hell Yeah! Sexy as hell’ towards matching underwear with a measly 4 people voting for ‘Prefer non-matching; More subtle, and therefore more sexy’. So what is it about matching undies that is so damn hot? Is it actually coordination that gets a guy going? Was that comedian onto something?
I have a tendency, such as many people my age, to not want to wear the same outfit twice. Sadly this avenue of thinking has led me down the path of underwear. I do not want to wear the same pair of sexy undies twice when having sex with/borderline-nakedly seducing someone. This idea is financially and physically draining; and my underwear collection has become eclectic and extensive because of this as I prefer to coordinate colour rather than straight up matching.
Giving me, as you can see above, a weird and wonderful spectrum of sexy colours. But as you can probably tell from the underwear collection collage I made last night, I prefer to wear black or pink.
So back to my original question: why is matching so hot? Apart the obvious scientific answer stating that coordination of colours and patterns is easier on the eyes I couldn’t seem to find a real answer to this question. So I asked around and my friend Lauren, the most coordinated person I know, said this:
“I love matching underwear, it makes everything more exciting! It makes my boyfriend still fancy me and you need to carry on fancying each other or everything gets boring.”
So is that it? Un-matching underwear is the epitome of comfort, when you’re settled with someone you don’t care what you wear because the reason they’re laid there in bed with you isn’t for the sex anymore. Well it probably is for the sex a bit; but I think every person who’s been in a relationship for a substantial amount of time can admit that they have donned the dreaded duck pants once or twice.
Or something equally as cringeworthy.
Many women say that wearing matching underwear ALL THE TIME, even when their not planning on seducing, is just normal. I admit I am this to an extent; I went to a BBQ this evening where I knew I was going to be the only female present, so before leaving the house I put on a lacy pair. I wasn't planning on sleeping with anyone at said BBQ (I mean come on; who goes to a BBQ expecting to pull?) but I still slipped into those sexy pants nonetheless. But if I was going to an all girls BBQ I would not have done this, so it must be something to do with the possibility of sex.
Maybe it's like having a condom in your purse, even if you know you're never going to have sex in a pub. I personally have never just randomly had sex with someone on a night out but there's still a cheeky Durex in there, just to be safe.
Oh and just for the record; I love my duck pants. And if anyone wants to see me in the sexy, lacy, see-through numbers they better get ready to accept the ducks. Because isn't that a perfect metaphor for all the good things in life..? On the surface it's smokin hot with little bows... but deep down dear readers; life says 'quack' on it.
Stay Sexy
xAx
I think the reason people rate coordinating as more attractive is nothing to do with the visuals of it, or even the underwear itself - it's just because it's a sign that the girl has anticipated sex, and made the effort to dress for it. It makes guys feel a bit spoilt and wondering what else the girl has done to prepare herself...
ReplyDeleteFireman Sam pants all the way. recently found myself half naked wearing said pants. But I think everything from my actions to what I was saying extinguished any "unsexy thoughts" fireman sam might have conjured up in the boy's mind.
ReplyDeleteWhilst, I love my matching underwear with a passion, genuinely because I think they enhance my body, making it look neat and prim and proper (well maybe not so much the latter) however, I think that if you can still ooze confidence and sex appeal in fireman sam (or duck!) pants then underwear's got nothing to do with it!
My ex wasn't that into matching underwear, as he said: it all comes off in the end, it's what's underneath that counts. and he's right, in more ways than one.
london girl up north
I quite like the duck pants, to be honest.
ReplyDeleteYeah, so underwear can be sexy, but it's the person in the underwear that's really the sexy thing - the present, not the wrapping, per se. In fact, being able to wear whatever pents you want - ranging from Aladdin (me), to Hello Kitty (TD - although she had lots of different pants, with cherries, elephants and all sorts), to plain white (Louise) - and not try and fit in or co-ordinate for fear of rejection - is a form of confidence, the way I see it.
And confidence, apparently, is also sexy.
Yeah...sure! You had sex three times but only in your wildest dreams.
ReplyDeleteEven if it was sex, it may NOT be intercourse. It was just outer-course.
So...GOD WINS again, xAx!
I admire your courage to FIGHT God's Vaginal Lock (nun's vagina)-an instrument of God's population control.
You cannot beat vaginal masturbation because God owns you.
There's nothing sexier than a woman who knows how to use her vagina by pleasing herself.
really though?
ReplyDeleteHang on... how did he know you had sex three times the other night? Is he stalking you on Twitter as well?
ReplyDeleteMaybe Maypaki has some form of psychosexual fixation on girls with vaginismus. I wonder if prayer will help with that too.
MULTIPLE POST SHOCK!
ReplyDeleteApoologies for flooding, but I just had to share...
Roger McGough, my favourite poet, has a poem on the very subject from a male point of view. I thought it might put things in perspective for you!
I can't find it anywhere on the Internet so I'll copy it out verbatim for you. It's called What Man Wears.
What man wears beneath his trousers
Women confide, seldom arouses
Silken briefs or satin thong
Will make her giggle loud and long
Of course, you'll never stand a chance
In saggy, Y-front underpants
Wear boxer shorts, ideally plain
(Not Disney, cartoons are a pain
in the bum) Tartan only for the Scots
No stars and stripes, no polka dots
No Union Jacks or football logos
Phallic jokes? Definitely no-noes
Regard your underwear as a friendly go-between
So teach it manners and, above all, keep it clean.
Hope that helps. Certainly made me smile!
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ReplyDeleteNo, I do not have some form of psychosexual fixation on girls with vaginismus.
ReplyDeleteI just want to enlighten people about the TRUE POWER OF GOD over a woman's ignorance of her sexuality.
Even if she does know how to orgasm, it is an equivalent to CHILDISH ORGASM.
Rubbing the clitoris? It's not used for intercourse!!
I have nothing against clitoral masturbation, but if that's all that she can do to please herself, then she's still DUMB about her vagina.
She is God's population controller.
God wins again.
GOD CAN REALLY MANIPULATE A WOMAN'S BODY.
Did you really just use the words 'God' and 'manipulate'in the same outlandish sentence?
ReplyDeleteI finally realized that God is indeed a MALE.
ReplyDeleteThe reasons are thus:
1.) If God is a female, she would never inflict women with painful intercourse. She would merely inflict them with infertility. Her empathy towards women's feelings will always prevail.
2.) It is known in history that men treat women as property. Therefore, if God inflicts a woman with primary vaginismus,thick hymen and dry vagina, then her vagina is now the property of God. She's meant to control the population.
God uses her as an instrument to reveal who the real rapists are, thereby upholding women's most divine right -the right NOT to be raped.
This proves that God is a male, because for him, there are things more important than empathy towards females.
This explains why painful intercourse is MORE COMMON among females than males.
Because God is a MALE and treats some women as his property to control the population.
If God is a female, it would've been the other way around.
Primary Vaginismus.
ReplyDeleteIf you have it, then your body is NOT designed for sex.
It is God's way of telling a woman that she is DESTINED to become a nun or celibate.
So if you have it, go on and BECOME A NUN.
Or be CELIBATE.
That's because it is God's way of controlling the global population. God created women with such sexual dysfunction to keep them away from sex and thus preventing conception. Unfortunately, most women don't realize it and would still go through days and weeks of therapy which is just time consuming.
Trying to remedy your condition is against God's will.
God does NOT want you to have sex.
If your a woman, don't get married & don't have sex if your VAGINA wont let you.
God had CLOSED the gates of your virginity.
FACE IT! You have a NUN'S VAGINA.
It is time to give up on men and become a NUN.
VAGINISMUS may be the answer to overpopulation.
God truly works in strange ways.
I am now an enlightened man.