“OH MY GOD PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE” is not a thing people generally want to hear coming from someone they fancy; I therefore decided that I’m better off telling you rather than screaming that statement to a certain person who is currently trying to force himself into my life. Let me explain;
I have a draft blog post titled Nice guys finish last, awesome guys finish in her revolving around the previously growing friendship with a boy suffering from a classic case of ‘nice guy syndrome’.
The Nice Guy is the guy you text when you want to feel good about yourself in a nice way (rather than a sordid way like Cas and every other Not Nice Guy that you talk to). The Nice Guy is LOVELY. One of the nicest guys I’ve ever met. Despite being horrendously fucked over and up by the girl he lost his virginity to, he manages to not be a jerk. But sadly, as the story goes for most nice guys, they are not instantly appealing. As much as I feel like I should like him; I don’t.
And I’ll tell you why I don’t: ever since I invited him to a party at my house last week, in a completely FRIENDS ONLY manner, he has become a bit.. overexcited:
1. He sends me texts twice ‘just in case the first didn’t send’.
2. He then sends me a facebook mail with exactly the same message since he was ‘online anyway’.
3. Whenever I’M online and haven’t replied to attempts 1 or 2, he starts a conversation with the same message, which in most cases has been a ‘hey u k?’ type catastrophe.
4. Once I have stopped pretending to be enthralled by his riveting conversation and haven’t replied for a good 10 minutes he pulls out the timeless ‘whoops wrong convo’ trick.
That’s why I don’t.
It's not like I even express any feelings towards him that aren't simply platonic. I really really like him (..as a friend) and as much as I want to be friends with him he won’t fucking let me JUST BE FRIENDS WITH HIM! He has this sort of platonic magnetism; you want to be friends with this guy. He’s funny, friendly, confident, everything you look for in a friend. However whatever friendly gesture I put towards him he throws back in my face along with his penis. I need to just stop being his friend, for his own good. Like screening calls, but with people. He’s having a party in the second week of August though so it would be a shame to cut him out my life before then…
Plus there’s the fact that I want to get with one of his best mates at said party.
He may fly off the handle when this happens.
xAx
Sounds less like "Nice Guy" and more like "Clingy, Possessive Guy". There's a difference.
ReplyDeleteI have nice guy syndrome. Yes, I am the boy that you call/text when you want to feel better and yet have bad luck with girls because I'm too nice. So I kind of identify with the guy in question here.
ReplyDeleteThere is, of course, the possibility that his clinginess and repetitive messaging could come out of general concern for you - he is, after all, nice... but then again, if you suspect that he does want to get into your pants, then this is normal behaviour for someone who's very keen.
And you can't blame him for his persistence, even if it is annoying.
I would say don't cut him off. Two wrongs don't make a right. And hey, what if he gets off with someone else at this party of his? Then he might leave you alone. And we could all do with a few really nice friends... right?
Unbelievable! the exact same thing has happened to me... only I was too much of a nice girl about it and somehow he now thinks we're dating... I'm actually writing a post about it at the moment!
ReplyDeleteSo yeah... your situation isn't AS BAD as mine so count yourself lucky :D
I just read the next few paragraphs. It is my opinion you add a considerable amount of energy to build this particular article. I really thank you for get the job done
ReplyDeleteHe sounds annoying. And not that nice. But maybe I'm a heartless bitch.
ReplyDeleteFunnily enough my most recent blog post touches on this issue.
ReplyDeleteI am going to assume this guy is me when I was 18 and you know what you need to do? You need to stop using him to masturbate your ego and tell him the truth about his behaviour.
Seriously, it took me until I was in my mid-20s to realise how unattractive these kind of needy behaviours are. I have a lot of truly great girl friends, but there were a fair few who sat firmly in the category of 'failed to pull, taking this as second best' and the thing is it's something you only realise if it's spelled out to you.
Pathetic though it may sound, it was only when I read 'The Game' by Neil Strauss that I realised what a fool I'd been. Give this guy the gift of being able to enjoy his 20s by snapping him the fuck out of this right now. But you have to back it up by not then enabling his behaviours.
That said, i spent most of the parties I went to as a teen feeling shit exactly because of girls pulling my mates in front of me and doing that when you've not even made it clear to him how he's making you feel is downright harsh.
Not only that, but the second he meets someone and loses interest in you - are you going to be strong enough to NOT encourage it back? Because that's what the WORST girls did to me. When I got over them or met someone who actually fancied me, it was come-on-just-strong-enough, give me enough rope to hang myself with.
The subject of 'nice guys' touches a nerve with me, as you may have noticed. feel free to email me about this if you want to talk in more depth x
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ReplyDeletecatalogueofdisasters [at] gmail [dot] com
ReplyDeleteWhy do we always keep referring to God as a male?
ReplyDeleteThe Bible only mentions Him as male. Is there any actual evidence that we can see to prove his gender?
YES. THERE IS!
Painful intercourse is more common among females than males. Therefore, God is a male.
This is how God asserts his masculinity over a woman's body.
A woman with Vaginismus, Dry Vagina or Thick Hymen DO NOT deserve to be touched by any man.
Her body belongs to God.
It is God's method of population control.
If you disagree, then prove to me that God is a female.
God is a female, because the London Underground is clear evidence for the fact that bits of the world were designed by a woman with PMS.
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHA. xAx is such a POSER.
ReplyDeleteHer blog subtitle said: "Living with and attempting to overcome vaginismus as a sex-craving eighteen year old."
LOL. She's pretending to crave for intercourse despite the fact that her vagina DOES NOT.
Stop being pretentious, xAx. You cannot crave for something that can hurt you.
If you really do crave to get hurt, just admit that you're a SANDO-MASOCHIST.
That's the consequence of violating your VAGINAL RIGHTS:
1.) Vagina's right to refuse sex.
2.) Vagina's right to self pleasure.
2.) Vagina's right to self lubricate.
You could be a SANDO-MASOCHIST or face you destiny: nunnery or celibacy.
I suggest you should watch the VAGINA MONOLOGUE.
It influenced my views on women's rights as well as VAGINAL RIGHTS.
What's a SANDO-MASOCHIST? Sounds like a move from Pokémon.
ReplyDelete"Pidgey, use your SANDO-MASOCHIST attack!"
HAHAHHAHAHAHA. I bet if A's vagina had limbs it'd crave to hit Maypaki to try and shut him up. VAGINAL RIGHTS!
ReplyDeleteI believe sando-masochism is self inflicted sandpaper fetishism.
ReplyDeleteSounds nasty...
Wanted to say that I have just read the whole of your blog (bit silly as I have to get up early in the morning - oops) And wanted to say that I really enjoyed it and to keep up the good work. Also, am impressed - you are having A LOT more sex than I managed at 18!
ReplyDelete"you are having A LOT more sex than I managed at 18!"
ReplyDeleteOh, please. You're making a fool of xAx.
What she experienced were just PRETEND sex (oral, handjobs) and genital assault (painful intercourse).
Intercourse is supposed to be pleasurable, not painful for BOTH partners.
xAx has NO respect for her VAGINAL RIGHTS and end up becoming a MASOCHIST.
God owns her vagina for population control.
Everyone who tries to have intercourse with xAx is a CLOSET RAPIST.
I am a man who believes in women's rights as well as VAGINAL RIGHTS.
You either believe in women's rights, OR you believe that a non-manifest omnipotent sky-fairy 'owns" women's bodies. The two positions are irreconcilable.
ReplyDeleteI know I should leave him alone but his hilarious attempts to rationalise his ridiculous belief system are too entertaining...
Maypaki why don't you just leave her alone! Bastard. Prove to you that God is female? Well prove to me that God exists at all and your arguments might be taken into account. As it is you are practically HARASSING an 18 year old girl with UNFAIR and UNPROVEN religious MUMBOJUMBO about her disability and should be reported to anyone that has any power to kick your gullible freaky ass!
ReplyDeleteGOD IS REAL. I have a STRONG FAITH in God.
ReplyDeleteThe evidence is obvious. Such as:
1.) The beauty of the universe and the complexity of biology -a proof of an intelligent Designer..
2.) Painful intercourse is more common among women -a proof that God is a male.
Primary Vaginismus had STRENGTHENED my faith in God. Some higher power can manipulate a woman's body to control the population. I am now an enlightened man.
You've just completely undone your argument by citing Faith and then attempting to cite evidence.
ReplyDeleteThere's almost certainly no God. Stop trolling this poor girl